It is a small set of rooms – sparsely furnished, but with items of good quality and taste. Some of the furnishings may be a little moth-eaten and burnt around their the edges yet, like its occupant, my apartment maintains and air of calm and class. This morning, however, sense of displacement. Disjointed from my usual place in the universal flow and contiuum I awake suddenly and without warning to an unusual odour. Permeates the air like an overabundance of cheap cologne, thick undertone of sulphur – sticks in the throat –coating the sides, thick and liquid – makes me gag.
In the bathroom – try to spit out the cloying stink, rinse my mouth thoroughly with cool running water from nickel-plated faucet. This smell, I am certain, is what the pope smells when he thinks of the devil’s asshole. What is this scent? Where did it come from? Inauspicious beginning to the proceedings, that much is for certain. Lay my head briefly against cold glass of mirror – remants of sleep dissolving, grey cobwebs catching thought and dripped in suplphuric acid – drift slowly into consciousness. Awake now, in the fullest sense of the word. The unusual scent remains, but not so powerful or overwhelming. Ability to think returning, I am able to move freely about my rooms.
First things first, I must dress myself. Select my suit – the brown one – well enough cut, though slightly worn at knees and elbows. Recall that it once hung better on me, but as I look in the mirror my thin form appears to shrink into the garment – insectoid shrinkage in fading morning cocoon – well, I suppose not all of us can crawl out of bed looking like Johnny Weismuller. Trousers jingle with reassuring sound of loose change, find full box of matches and a few intact cigarettes in one of the pockets. This will do just fine. Shirt – white, starched, but soft and slightly greasy from lying on the floor too long. No obvious odour besides comforting scent of tobacco (Marlboro flavour country – passport expired for twenty-one years), nevertheless, good reminder to make excursion to the laundromat. Tie and socks: rather plain affair – no man with a shred of self respect needs fancy socks. The presence of patterns and – god forbid – pictures, are a good indicator of poor character. Nothing good has ever come of a polka-dot. (It is worth noting, however, that a very particular case is presented by argyle socks: a man with argyle socks is not to dismissed out of hand, but he is certainly not to be trusted. I have not yet discovered the reason for this, but my belief is that the argyle sock functions in much the same way as the old school tie in some portions of the world – the diamond pattern covertly signals to the knowing passer-by a secret bond of class and kinship like some sort of ankle-bound masonic handshake. Advice: be very wary of any man who displays his socks too openly.)
Secondly, step over a small stack of books (hardcovers), around a taller column (cheap paperbacks for the most part), return to the bathroom to perform the usual sequence of daily ablutions. The process of waste elimination is largely uneventful. Next, wash face and hands with cold water, shave bristles from cheeks and neck – arrogant blue steel – rough wire on wire, remember to change the materials. This all proceeds routinely enough. Comb pulls with difficulty through hair – slick with accumulated Bryllcreem, makes a wet sound, like someone clearing their throat of a dark and unnatural mass – must remember to wash it soon. Unpleasant, yes – but not ominous. Taken altogether, nothing untoward or unsual occurs during the performance of these functions – scent has faded almost completely from my nostrils, ambient dead air in faint perception. Calmed and refreshed, thinking slows, returns to near normal pacing. Perhaps this day will not be so bad after all.
Briefly consider making list of things I need to do today when thought patterns are rudely interrupted. Voice in the air – rough and rasping like one of those deep sea fish with the lights on top. Presence of voice is not unusual in itself – television left running at any and all times, got to stay up to date with the worldly wonder, fill vacuous airspace with information transmission ready for immediate interception – but there is something different about this particular voice. Kind of voice that catches your attention in a crowded room and propositions you with unthinkably deviant sexual acts – kind of voice that belongs to the most sordid and most successful pimps. What’s worse, it addresses me directly in a way that the televison, as a rule, does not.
“Agent… some time since we last spoke… remain in memory, files always on hand… ready for action should the sitation require…”
Salivating tones reverberate around the tiled walls of my bathroom, seep into my pores like infected plasma. Clean calmness disintegrating rapidly – things are beginning to get weird. Pull a cigarette out of the soap-dish, attempt to ignore the voice and go about my morning routine in the usual sequence. Today’s paper is outside my front door – move to collect it, rack brain through multitudinous databanks – attempt to place voice in a known context. Familiar to my ears, but I simply cannot work out where I have heard it before – no known referant, no indentifiable characteristics. This troubles me as, being a generally unsociable man, I have only a small pool of people who might address me in this manner.
I do not intentionally isolate myself from other people – it is just that I prefer to be left to my own devices and do readily not concern myself with the affairs of others. Over the years a premonitory sense has developed (naturally and through various methods of training) – a burning red/white light – cerebral cortex, St Elmo’s fire – warns me of impending danger and strangeness. This psychic preeminence has helped me a great deal over the years, lends credence to theory that lives of other people are best left alone. Today early warning system is primed and in full force – intense shock deep within the skull shoots up the inside of the brain cavity and across the backs of both eyes like electrical fire – this is the greeting I receive when I pick up today’s newspaper from the floor in front of my apartment door. Political intrigue – the basest of human occupations. Coffee first – not ready for this sort of thing at this juncture. The smell, the voice, and now this prescient shock – these are all ill omens, I have a strong feeling this this day will be unusual in a way that I will not appreciate.
I do not keep coffee in my apartment. For that and all other sustenance I must venture forth into the city. Small café at the base of my building – greasy, stainless steel – serves my purposes well – the staff there know me and treat me with respect and dignity, something that is sorely lacking in this modern world. Usual routine: approach café through direct methods not long after sunrise to drink coffee and prepare for day’s operations – regular like laxative day at the old folks’ home. Before this ritual can take place, however, I must first deal with this blinding pain in my head. I keep a variety of shamanic herbs, high grade pharmaceuticals, and other medications in my bathroom cabinet. Most of these have been prescribed to me by a doctor of some standing – Dr Steinway, medical marvel and surgeon extraordinaire – trained in various warzones on rusty appendectomy kick, ether comes as naturally as scotch on the rocks – always trust a man like Steinway to get the job done. Select a few bottles at random, swallow two or three capsules, deposit a small pile of pink pills (crablike substance, sharp and crustaceous) loose in my pockets. Might come in handy later – you never know when you might need your medicine. Throw a small handful of cigarettes in with the pills, deposit the rest of the pack throughout my suit.
“Agent… ready for action… egregious Control operations in focus throughout current time… special set of skills required…”
That damn voice again. Buzzes through my bones as I search for my hat amongst a stack of magazines (stained, secondhand, obliquely pornographic in nature). I require caffeine – nicotine is only fighting half the battle. Stentorian click of soft adding machine – works of the inner monologue – voice blooms into recognisable format and nature – I have heard it before and I know that there is no point resisting the Agency when it comes for you. They have ways of making people conform, and it is only a matter of time before I will acquiesce – but perhaps I can have my goddamned cup of coffee before I become part of this mess. Sharp stab in the left eye again – no time to linger. I fix up my tie, grab my hat (battered grey-felt piece, came to me through uneasy means in travels of a former time), stomp out of the apartment – head straight for the stairwell, no time for surveillance of the neighbours (usual occupation in dangerous times) – I need my goddamned coffee. Grab the paper on the way out the door, glance at the front page – no headache this time, but cause can be isolated. The Election is on and Minister Shepherd – holder of some vague cabinet position and forerunning candidate – is on the front page. I have never liked that woman, but recently something about her has deeply unsettled me. No doubt that’s what this business with Agency is all about – Control has infiltrated the democratic process, and now I am being enlisted to help sort it out. Further information will follow. They know my habits well enough by now to rendezvous at the café – at least let a man wake up properly before you go throwing him into the middle of an espionage mission.
**
From Chapter I Making an Entrance